Ponderings on A Weekly Focus and Goal Making

I have a friend who's pretty brilliant. I look up to her in a lot of ways. Her name is Tanney, and she has a blog called Our Fairy Tale that she maintains much better than I maintain this here blog of mine. There are two blogs that I actually read, hers and my friend Michele's, because I love them and I miss them.

And you know what? For a while, I tried to be like other bloggers. I tried to do the different link-ups and different daily designations of topics, like Tasty Tuesdays and what not. I tried to fit in with the blogging world. And then I got bored and stopped. I'm not that kind of blogger. I'm the kind of person who just likes to sit down and write a note to my friends and family, or to myself, add some dumb pictures I created on the fly, and then call it good. And that works for me.

BUT my friend Tanney has a link-up that I actually think is a good idea. It makes sense. She calls it the Weekly Focus. You know what I think? I think that a lot of people make yearly goals, and then forget to make plans to attain those ideals. I think that people neglect the fact that it is the everyday and weekly adjustments that make the most considerable difference in the outcomes of our actions. Having a weekly focus is a great way to gear your attentions on a specific area in which you aim to gain greater control and achievement. 

So I shall participate in this link-up. I doubt that anyone will really read this post, since it has none of my nonsensical pictorials or hair brained witticisms, but that is absolutely fine. I have thoughts and ponderings on this subject, and as a true student of my subject, I'm going to write about them.

If you hadn't noticed from some previous posts, pregnancy and I do not always get along like good chums. Sometimes we don't even get along as well as the snot-nosed geek and the snot-everything-elsed bully on the school playground. One of the biggest problems is hormones, mood swings, that part of you that rises up and fights with the other part of you for no other purpose than to make you confused and irately irrational. This just makes me more upset, since I'm not the kind of girl who was granted monthly practice with these evils during my formative years. Nope. Hormone-induced idiocy to this extent is new, horrid, and blatantly stupid. 

I made a goal that I would stop being ridiculous about my hormone swings. Actually, I called Mama in a fit of tears and begged her to tell me what to do. She suggested that I learn to differentiate between myself and the hormones, because getting upset at myself when there was not always a lot I could do was just pointless and aggravating to the situation. As usual, Mama was right. And that's when I made the goal to stop being ridiculous about how I reacted to hormonal swings.

But that's a tall order, isn't it?

So what was I supposed to do? Just stop it? That wouldn't work. That wouldn't work at all. If that were an option, I think more pregnant women before me would have opted for that one. You can't really effectively work for a goal if there isn't a way to have applicable, practical, and viable steps of achievement along the road to the ultimate finish. Rather than declaring brashly that I am no longer going to be ridiculous about the most ridiculous part of pregnancy, I must rather detail blatantly the steps that I will take when I come into a situation that would test this goal of mine.

For example, please consider the following:

1. I become overly emotional regarding the selection of a dinner item. I am disheartened that no dinner selection is made, that Andrew isn't more specific in what he wants to eat, that I am now very hungry, that I have no reason to be so emotionally upset over this decision process and I am anyway, and that all of this is pathetically lacking in any kind of result, especially results that would lead to us eating dinner any time soon.

2. What do I do? I have a goal to be non-ridiculous about my hormones influencing my reactions and actions and feelings. But HOW do I make that an application right now, when it actually matters?

3. I have to recognize that the hormones aren't necessarily me, and that I should stop getting more upset at myself. If I'm trying to fight a battle against irrationality, my rational side getting beaten up by my rational side itself is not going to help anyone.

4. I should take a step back from the situation. Is there an underlying cause for this? Well, when I get hungry, I'm not known for my charm and easy-going nature. Could my hormones be aggrandizing this typical reaction of mine to megalithic proportions? It could be that having a quick snack could help me to be more realistic about what is happening.

5. I should do something about the actual problem. We need dinner? Well, shoot. Let's have something for dinner. Even if it's cereal as a placeholder till we can find a real supper, that's still something for now. Stopping looking for grand, miraculous ways out, and do something small and simple while you can.

6. Maybe tonight is a crisis because nothing was done to prepare for this moment earlier. I can avoid future repetitions of this problem by making sure that dinner articles are prepared earlier. Meat to be thawed can be stuck in the fridge to defrost, menus can be made so that there are no decisions to be made nightly, shopping can be done so that ingredients are available to use. 

Do you see what I mean? There has to be a method in which to apply your goal to your actual real life. Your life isn't a hypothesis, so don't make goals like it is one. Make goals that are livable by having steps you can actually do on the way to becoming that goal.

And those are my ponderings on weekly focuses, which will help you to break down your bigger goal into manageable portions, and goal making. If nothing else, my head is clearer. That tends to happen when I write things down. I'm a writer. What can I say?

So, have any thoughts on the subject? Want to see what my friend Tanney has to say on it? You can read her blog post at that link right there. Happy thinkings!

I'm a 16 Year Old Russian Princess

The title of this post really does say it all. I'm not actually 22, I'm 16. And I was crowned Miss Russia this year. Oh, and one more thing. I'm really great friends with Jane from the Kiera Knightly version of Pride and Prejudice. Are you wondering how all of this started?

I have heard from more than one person that I look younger than I actually am. Usually I get pegged down a few years. However, it seems that the older that I get, the younger I get according to the people around me. And I'm pretty sure it's not because I'm getting more immature. There is one young man (to whom I've never actually spoken- I heard this from his mother) who said, "Every time I see her, I think she's 16!" Yup. I'm 16 and I'm married to a 28 year old dude. Man, I sure did find a serious cradle robber!

And now I'm constantly worried about flashing my ring all over the place, so no super awkward moments happen. My friend Kristina was out and about, and some guy came up and asked for her number. Kristina is married and has three kids. Yup. Talk about awkward. Super flattering, but awkward for all involved.

I'm not offended, and looking forward to the future, I think that I'll be flattered when I get older and I'm a 75 year old hag getting taken for a 50 year old hot mama. Yup. I'm sure that's how that will go. At least, it will if I go down the same road that my Mama leads. That right there is Mama and Buggy. Yes, that woman gave birth to all 10 of us children. And she looks fantastic.

(NOTE: For a good Pictorial read, go refresh yourselves by meeting Buggy as she and I almost die in smelliness and as she gave us directions to nowhere.)

(ANOTHER NOTE: Mama is neither 75, 50, nor anywhere in between. I just thought I'd point that out. She's a spry spring chicken.)

Not only was I recently informed of my true age and my return to the teens, I also discovered that some people think that the lady crowned as Miss Russia this year bears a striking resemblance to myself. I, of course, think that it's highly fitting that I be taken as a Russian princess. Isn't my name very suiting?

Miss Russia 2013

Miss Natashya 2011

What do you think? Close enough? My Aunt Becky said that I'm prettier, so I think that means that I should get the crown. I think it's only fair. Even if I don't live in Russia, or participate in the pageants. I've loved Russian crowns ever since I saw Anastasia when I was little, and formed a subsequent mild obsession over her story (and the beauty of her dress which ended up destroyed by Rasputin- what a shame). Dimitri is definitely one of the best looking animated characters out there. Not that he's anywhere near as handsome as Andrew. Andrew is the fairest, er, handsomest in the land! True story.

NOT a picture of Andrew. Or Dimitri, for that matter. This is Tess.

My friend Pook, more commonly referred to as Tess, also received information regarding her appearance recently. (I would like to take a brief moment to note that I have very few friends that I call by their actual names. No wonder I confuse people when I'm telling stories.) She was told that she looks a lot like Jane from Pride and Prejudice. That's pretty complimentary, considering that Jane is described as an "angel" and "classically beautiful." I'll settle for Lizzy's description of having "fine eyes" since I also get the Miss Russia crown. Also, Pook- you are pretty fantastic. I think you're a swell gal, and I'm glad that we're friends.

Can I just add one more note? I'm married to Spider-Man. Just take a look at this face.

Andrew has been informed more than once that this hero resembles his own person. Andrew is by far and away the most handsome superhero ever. But he's not just any kind of superhero. He's a Ninjaneer. He saves people from technology. He's cool like that.

And that's all I've got for now. I was just going through life this week when I kept getting all of these "HEY! You look like 'name of person, place, or thing' that I saw 'in/around/by/at or time'!!!" I think it's interesting that we sometimes determine who looks like who by who we know better, or by who we are talking to. Do I look like Miss Russia, or does she look like me? Or do we look like each other? Perspective, I suppose, makes all the difference.

Do I know any other famous people out there? Seriously. Who have you been told that you look like?

NOTE: Dear Pictorial Requester- I'm sorry that the Pictorial didn't come today, or yesterday. But I do promise you that it will come. I send my love and a small box of assorted cookies in your general direction.

How to Be Happy With Your Miserable Life

Did any of you wonder why I stopped blogging for months? It's not like I have an apparent excuses like I did while in school. I'm a stay at home wife, I don't have any children, and I don't have a job other than to keep our home tidy, beautiful, and well stocked with baked goods. It is obvious, therefore, that a lack of writing is not due to a lack of time. And it's not just that drawing all of those pictures takes a whole lot of effort.  More than may be apparent at first glance. No, it goes a little further than that.

For the past year or so, I've been dealing with a health problem. I can't tell you what it is since I don't know what it is. Despite visiting many doctors, including specialists, we still have no diagnosis. I can tell you that it involves pain, limited energy, frustration, fear, and a very limited range of activities. There are days when just about all I can do is lounge on the couch and read books. Although, when I put it that way, my life sounds like an English major's dream- to sit and read all day.

Regardless of my love of reading, being unable to get up and walk around because of the pain becomes very tiresome. It can really chew out and completely ruin your self-respect, and any dignity you wish to maintain. There are days when it's practically impossible to cook because I haven't washed any dishes for the past while. There have been days when I couldn't even walk to the bathroom. Andrew had to carry me. For a girl who loves to dance about, bake, pretty and tidy up, be productive, and fulfill her duties and responsibilities, this has been a difficult time for me.

But I don't hate my miserable life. In fact, I'm a happy woman.

We therefore have a question before us: "Why on earth do you draw such ridiculous pictures and write such brilliantly bizarre blog posts if you're hurting and/or feeling like a lazy scumbag? And how do you manage to find so many funny things?"

Because it makes me happy. That's why. Especially when people look at those posts and laugh, or think, or smile, or pass it on. It makes me feel productive. But more about that productivity stuff in another post. This post is about managing to find the happiness that is all around you, just waiting to be seen and felt.

The answer is in three little words. Faith. Hope. Charity. I'm going to go in reverse order.

Charity. How can you ever be happy when you're sitting around thinking about all of the downers in your life? How can you be happy when you focus on your messy living room, unshaved legs, nasty hair, immobility, and that very empty candy bag? (Well, the candy bag being empty may have cheered you up while you were emptying it into your mouth, but having that candy go to your thighs is not pleasant.) I'll tell you what, you can't. You can't be happy when you focus on that. You have to focus your attention on other people. Find out what makes them happy, and celebrate with them. Find out what's making them sad, and search for a way to make it better. Start with your spouse, your family, your roommates, whoever is closest to you. Serve them. It will make your life light up like a Christmas tree, each time you leave a plate of cookies on a doorstep, sit down and have a chat with someone lonely, or give someone a can of soup when they're ill, another little bulb on your strand of lights clicks on, bringing in a happy color, and a happy bit of dimension to your view on life.

Hope. Faith and hope are so connected, so intertwined. I have hope that tomorrow will be better than today. I hope that I can do better today than yesterday. A better wife, a better friend, a better person, a better Natashya. I have hope. And not just the kind of hope that involves wishing for the snow to go away, or that my pick for the NCAA bracket will win (which they won't, since they've already lost. Whoops.). My hope is an expectation. I expect that my circumstances will get better. I am doing everything that I can to improve my situation, and I have faith that everything will work out. Even if my body continues to hurt, I know that my actions can better my life before I'm healed. I can still find ways to make today better, to get closer to my goals. With my mother's help, I made a schedule. I work on something different every day. If I don't get everything checked off the list, that's alright. I'm still a good person. I tried. And because I'm continuing to try, and because I have a wonderful husband who does so much to help and lift me, and because I have a loving Savior, everything really will be just fine.


Faith. The Lord is omniscient and omnipotent. He is also full of mercy and love. Having faith in His love, in His plan, in His timing will help you to get through the darkest moments. The Savior went through the agony of Gethsemane because of His love for us, and because of that suffering, He can not only cleanse our sins, but also "bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound" (Isaiah 61:1). Do you think that sins are the only chains which bind mankind? What about the chains of pain and suffering, both physical and emotional?

Jesus Christ can heal all wounds, for He understands all sorrows. "He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief... Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows; yet we did esteem him stricken, stricken of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him, and with his stripes we are healed" (Isaiah 53:3-5). Jesus Christ gave His life for us, lives again for us, and desires to help us in all of our trials. He can heal all of our bruises and stripes. Remember to "cast your cares upon the Lord; for he careth for you" (1 Peter 5:7). He really does.

I don't generally share the glum side of life because there is so much more to rejoice in than to despair over. However, I thought that perhaps since we all have dark moments, maybe the things that I've been learning over the past year will be good for more than just me to know. I do know that there is a way to be happy, even when life is dark and difficult. I do know that I'm more blessed than even I realize sometimes. I do know that there is always a ray of light and hope that we can cling to, and that we can follow. Just hold on to Him, and everything is going to be alright.

What's in a Name? Let's Discuss it Over (Yellow) Cake

Friends! Romans! Countrymen! Have you ever been fascinated by names? I have been, for a very long time. And it turns out that one of my very best friends shares that interest (see below). I love my name, and I'm very proud of it. There was also a time when I was jealous that Megan's name meant "pearl, or priceless treasure," because I was pretty sure that I was the princess in the family. But Megan really is a pearl of priceless worth, I can tell you that.

I promised you a cake recipe today as well. And thus I give unto you,

BETTER THAN BASIC YELLOW CAKE (and what's better than regular yellow but sunshine and daisy yellow? See decorating and consuming suggestions beneath recipe.)

4 eggs, separated                 2 3/4 cups flour                       1 1/2 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt                           1 cup butter, softened              2 cups sugar

2 tsp vanilla                          1 cup milk

Preheat oven to 350*, and grease and flour two 9" round pans. 

(For egg separating tips, please see notes from the White Chocolate Cheesecake recipe.) Beat egg whites stiff, but not dry, and set aside. Sift the flour, baking powder, and salt. I used Swans Down cake flour, which has been America's favorite cake flour since 1894, and is 27 times finer than all-purpose flour (how do they even get that specific?). You can use regular flour, too. Don't worry.

In large bowl cream butter. Gradually pour in sugar. Mix until fluffy. Beat in egg yolks one at a time. Add vanilla and continue to beat. Add the flour mixture to butter mixture in 3 additions, alternating with milk. Fold in egg whites gently and thoroughly. You don't use high speed mixers to "fold gently." You want to keep the fluffiness in the cake. I used a rubber spatula.

Pour batter into baking pans. Spread with spatula, Bake 35-40 min, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Another trick I learned from Daddy is to tap the top of the cake lightly. If it's springy, it's good. If you leave finger prints, it's not done. Cool in pan for 5 min before inverting onto a wire rack to cool completely. (If you're using a 9"x13", bake 45-50 min.) If your cake turned out crumbly, it may have been underbeaten, or the eggs you used may have been too small. Don't use tiny eggs. If it's dry, you may have baked it too long. Or left it on the counter in the open for way too long before frosting it.

Decorating and Consuming Ideas: Now, the best way to eat yellow cake is with a good chocolate frosting, made with cream cheese and butter, not with shortening. It tastes better that way. I would say to lovingly slather your cakes in said good frosting, and stack the cakes. Maybe some flowers would be cute, since it's getting to be spring. I like to use colored tootsie rolls instead of fondant, since I think it is so tasty. Make daisies for your Better Than Basic Yellow cake. That's what I did for my birthday cake one year, with leaves and stems. It was very cute. Too make everything perfect, serve with vanilla ice cream. 

NOW, since you've been prepared to make food for the digestive system, read on to find some food for the thoughtful system. And the part of you that wants entertainment. Have you ever been on Facebook, but there's nothing to look at on there, and you don't know what other site to go to for distraction? Try Tanney's blog. She's way more entertaining than staring at the blinking cursor in the URL bar, trying to figure out what to type and where to go. She's also one of my dearest friends. You may remember her from this post here about why she's my best friend, or this one about how we're twin sisters. I also did a guest post on her blog about the Arabian way to stop a smoke alarm. You should meet her.

My name is Tayler Morrell. Tashya knows me as Tanney Christiansen. (Nickname, Maiden Name). I am married about 8 months to my best friend, Justin.

I love to read fantasy and historical fiction, as well as just plain fiction (I am currently reading The Secret History of the World by Mark Booth. It is taking all esoteric and religious traditions and trying to make one solid history/truth out of it). I love writing--blog writing, journal writing, poetry (which honestly, I haven't done in a long time), and fantasy writing. One day, I hope to be published and be famous!

I love playing volleyball and soccer and would rather get down and dirty in the snow and mud with the boys, then sit on the sidelines cheering or even watching college/professional sports. I also love to cook!

I am a history teacher, hoping to teach English next year. I am currently doing a student teaching internship at Springville Junior High. I am trying to make sense of all my feelings and of my students here.

I want to travel. I have learned Welsh (Dw i'n siarad yn Nghymraeg.) and have studied abroad in Great Britain. That was almost 3 years ago, and I miss it so much, sometimes it hurts.

I mentioned before that Tashya knew me as Tanney. Looking at my name, Tayler, one wonders, how in the world did she get that name. Well, long story short, I wanted a nickname and Tayler doesn't really have nicknames besides Tay-Tay. Tanney is an amalgamation of my first name (Tayler) and my middle name (Bethany). Not a perfect one, but workable. You can read more about it here. I now go by Tayler, but a few close friends still call me Tanney, and I'm still juggling whether or not I want it to be my pen name when and if I become a published author.

However, I have always been entranced by names. In elementary and middle school, even reaching up to midway through high school, I would spend hours looking through baby name books and exploring websites of the same. My favorite was actually babynamesworld.com. So helpful! I loved learning what each name meant (Tayler=Old English for a tailor). Natashya= Greek for born at Christmas (or Christ's birth). I've always believed that names describe who you are--they hold the key to your personality. The rest of who you are is based on your name. (Unless you are a silly, weird named Utahn)

Names truly hold a certain power. Catholics are given a new name during their confirmation. Other religions do the same in special "coming-of-age" ceremonies and rituals. Why do we do this? Because of the power behind a name. I am fascinated, truly fascinated at the importance that names, and naming things, has in a culture. That is why I feel so empowered now, because I am actually using my name, rather than Tanney. Don't get me wrong, I still love Tanney--it holds sentimental value to me, but Tayler is my name, and thus the source of my power, my personality, my essence.

I would love for you to explore yourself as you explore my world. What similarities do we hold, what advice can we give each other? I am very good at following those who follow me, so if you want an extra reader, come and read Our Fairy Tale.

<center> <a href="http://morrellfairytale.blogspot.com/"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuGyk91ZnT77RZDZ9-Yqz7QD7S-AZ5fXUwUSq2SCRBZ4mmM_bTyzFDpra_EuUh0_vS2YKtA6bf_zchCchS6-k5ldXchkmAShKBhwoNkXMgXQpB28dn_9XHr2zueyolyEqJE2hyphenhyphendC_1Bdnr/s1600/photo.jpg" /></a></center>

Enjoying Compliments, and Missing the Source of Said Compliments

During my junior year of college at BYU, I took a Shakespeare class. Andrew would be quick to point out that it was not the only one that I took, but he's at work now, so I can say whatever I want. Huzzah for free speech! Anyway, I took this class and it was pretty interesting. In case you didn't know, I graduated with an English degree, and I love reading, and I love Shakespeare as well. Not all of his plays, mind you, but a lot of them. This was no ordinary Shakespeare class, however. It was different.

Instead of the usual run of the mill 10 page research paper for the final and whatever piece of torture for the midterm, we kept a blog during the semester. The blog was to be the equivalent of the research paper in work, but it was spread out over the whole course instead of writing it all the night before it's due. Because, let's be honest, what English major actually has time to write the paper for THAT class when they're already working on the other three papers for THOSE classes? This blog project was to help us to get around that problem while at the same time allowing us to have more freedom of tone and expression, and a whole lot of fun with media clips.

During a peer review, a classmate decided that she was one of the awesomest people on the whole planet, and gave me some very nice and glowing remarks. She said that not only was I a "FANTASTIC WRITER," but that"throughout the blog Natashya maintain’s a personable and intelligent voice. If these posts were handed to me in paper form with no identifying markers I would quite reasonably be able to assume that they were written by one person." That really makes a writer feel pretty good. A consistent voice that actually sounds intelligent? Awesome! (The peer review was done via blog post, and it's here if you wanted to see it. Even if you didn't, it's good to cite your sources.) (OH! And here's my somewhat intelligent Shakespeare blog that I did last year.)

Not going to lie- I feel pretty good about myself, and very benevolent towards this person. I mean, what taste and discernment! But besides feeling great because of these wonderful compliments (most of which were probably undeserved, since I really wasn't the best about posting on that blog- but it WAS the semester that I started dating Andrew...), I now realize something.

I miss writing. 

True story. I am one of those weird people that actually love to read something, and then analyze it in a paper. I LOVE it. I don't always like writing the paper in a very stressful time frame, especially when grades are on the line, but I do enjoy the actual activity. Did you know that I wrote a 12 page research paper on Disney princesses? Yup. It was about how society's ideal feminine archetype has changed from the Maiden to the Modern. I used Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Enchanted, and The Princess and the Frog as my texts. It was a really great paper to write. I mean, how many people get to watch three Disney movies for HOMEWORK?!

I know that a lot of people have said that they like this blog because of my personable writing tone. Honestly, I just write things how they come to my mind, almost as if I were just speaking. Maybe that makes some of you wonder what the heck kind of conversations I have with people, but I can assure you that most people I spend time with are rather splendid at understanding my language. And at speaking my language.

All of this goes to say don't be surprised if you suddenly see an essay pop up on here. Or maybe I'll just start writing stories. Stories about life. Or maybe I'll just keep blogging and writing in my journal.

NOTE: I'm starting another type of blog postings- the kind where I just blurb out something, even though there may be no point to it. If nothing else, it should at least help me get into the habit of posting.